Sometimes I just think about life...

…and I am amazed at how things turn out.

If you talked to me two years ago, I was adamant about my future. I was dead set on going to California for college and never giving these cornfields of Indiana a second thought. I would rather roam the hills and coast of San Francisco, scraping up whatever major I could to meet my interests. It was a long shot, but it’s what I wanted.

I’m not sure I could be anymore happier that this is not my reality now.

I can’t believe I was ever going to throw away the education am I getting now for some half-assed curriculum at just another general state school far away that I knew nothing about.

I can’t believe I was simply going to disregard Ball State’s phenomenal reputation for their Journalism department, especially Graphics and Advertising, and just get a general education elsewhere.

I can’t believe I was so discontent with Indiana that I was going to pass up a quality education with some of the best professionals and professors in the nation, one of the best programs in the nation, full of endless opportunity and excitement and connections, a program that would open so many doors for me in life.

I can’t believe I was ever going to just let that slip between my fingers…
all because I was sick of my hometown.

Well guess what, I’m not sick of Indiana anymore.

Do I still itch to get out and see the world? YES.

Do I still think I’ll begin my life after college elsewhere? YES.

But do I regret staying here? NO.

And I’ve grown to appreciate it so much more.
Not just because of the opportunities I have here, but just because of what it IS.

Indiana is my past, my home, my present.
It’s my childhood memories, my family, and everything that is familiar.
It’s the harsh winters I hate, but the exquisite autumns that I wouldn’t trade for anything.
 It’s everything that has made me into who I am today, right now.
It’s where my dreams began, even if those dreams want to take me somewhere else.

How could I not appreciate that? 

All plans are out the window

I always thought that I had a general idea about where my life would go...

4 years of college,
internship experience in San Francisco, Seattle, and Chicago,
a job in California,
and then life would go on...

But now, I don't even know what I want to do tomorrow, much less in years to come.
How do I know I ultimately want the west coast when I've spent minimal time on the east coast,
have never roamed New England,
and have never even given the south a second thought...

I'm at the point in my life where I can change my mind a thousand times.
I have the time to make decisions and decide what I want the rest of my life to be.

Why would I throw that away trying to conform to a 3-year-old dream?

I want to be...

FEARLESS

Unafraid to grab life by the reigns and chase my dreams.

Have the courage to be me, and not another society conformist.

Take a chance on new experiences.

Stand up for my own beliefs.

DETERMINED

To take control of my life and give it structure.

To be the best I possibly can.

To live without regret.

To accomplish what I feel is impossible.

DISCIPLINED

To not be discouraged.

To stay in control.

To follow my heart, but listen to my head.

SPONTANEOUS

To break out of my routined rut.

To learn by experience, not just books.

To find out who I really am, not who I am expected to be.

INVINCIBLE

[impossible]